3 min readEnhancewell
Antoni here, and I’m taking over the blog today because I’ve got a confession to make.
Fitness is my career. My passion. My constant. And over the past seven years, it’s become a source of intimidation and overwhelm.
If it can happen to me, it can happen to anyone.
Today, I’m sharing the story of how I went from fit to fluffy, and how I’m making my way back again.
From Fit to Fluffy and Back Again
First, let’s take a quick trip through my CV. I’ve sung and danced on Broadway before taking my talents abroad. I lived and performed all over Europe, staying in tip-top shape with nearly nightly performances.
When I retired from the shows, the gym became my stage. From one-on-one sessions with clients to packed-out classes and a couple of national-level roles in fitness and personal training education, I didn’t just teach others—I lived for fitness.
And then my hip started giving me issues in 2018.
A twinge here and there evolved into a full-blown hip replacement, followed by hours of physical therapy, and ultimately, clearance to return to work and physical activities in 2023. Then, right after about 4 weeks of trying to get back into shape, the second episode of a twinge and pain led us into hip replacement two. Now we’re looking at another year or so of inactivity from diagnosis to surgery, then through rehab before getting cleared again in 2025.
But I didn’t. The actual negative self-talk, self-doubt, and fear are now in full-blown effect
First, there was pain. And then there was shame. And then that molehill of uncertainty turned into a mountain of fear.
Even in the midst of practically living at the gym—owning a Pilates studio in NYC and helping hundreds of students—I wasn’t helping myself.
The intimidation factor was real, and so was the procrastination. I joined a gym in February. I didn’t set foot in it until July.
When I went inside, the gym was packed— zero empty treadmills in the whole gym. The thought crossed my mind to leave and try again another day, but I pushed past the discomfort and I stayed.
The first day, I ran 2.25 miles. The second day, I completed 2.75 miles.
3 Things That Changed My Fitness Journey
Here’s how I stopped the shame spiral and started a fitness path I’m proud of:
- Stop the negative self-talk – My clients may curse my requests for one more set of abs, but they’d all agree that I’m an encourager. The voice in my head was not so kind. I swapped the Negative Nancy for a kinder internal voice, giving myself the grace to try, fail, and try again.
- Hire a trainer – I can train myself. But I wasn’t. Instead, I hired a professional to help me when I wasn’t helping myself.
- Set a date – I can go to the gym whenever I want. The perks of living in “the city that never sleeps” and owning a gym. But I wasn’t. Now, I block out time in my calendar for gym sessions, and I treat them like any other appointment.
The best of intentions are a start, but they’re nothing without action. Life is full of surprises: injuries, new jobs, new life circumstances, illnesses. These can derail your fitness journey, and it’s up to you to take action to get back on track. It’s not easy, but it’s so worth it. I may never look like I did when I was 25 (who does?!), but I am so proud of myself for taking those baby steps.
If you’ve been saying you’re ready for a change for years, and you’re ready to take action, sign up for a private session at Enhancewell Collective. We’ll meet you where you are—no judgment—and help you take action on your goals.